he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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