She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Drake has all the answers
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
