I cannot find my penis.
She announced her abortion via fbk
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I would ride that face into the sunset
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
