My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
