Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
the night ended with taco bell and tears
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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