he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
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