The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Semen is not good for contacts.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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