is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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