how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize