i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
