at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I wear drunk well.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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