The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
