sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Randomize
