Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
my god I love twenty year old dicks
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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