thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
