NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
50% drunk capacity currently
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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