Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Two words: nipple clamps
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