I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Randomize