Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
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