isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
