Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
