Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
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