I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
