i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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