Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Randomize
