Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
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