she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
