i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
