Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
