That's intense
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
