So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
