This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
