Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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