READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
