I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
