My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
