i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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