butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
