I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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