She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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