Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
