Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
