you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
