Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
