don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
