Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
