We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
