im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
