a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
