we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
